Brian's Grandaddy, Mr. WD McCall, went to his eternal home in heaven last Friday. Although he was 95, and we were not surprised, it is always hard to prepare for death or accept it until it happens. Brian has so many childhood memories with his grandparents, but he told me that his favorites were going to the beach and fishing with his Granddaddy and when his Grandaddy taught him how to shoot a rifle and how to drive (on the farm land) at age 8! My best memory of Granddaddy McCall happened probably about 10 years ago as we sat, rocking, on the front porch of their house. Just as serious, he asked me (in a deep, stern, southern voice), "So- Kelly, do you cook?" I told him that I could cook, but that I didn't like to cook very often. He responded, "Well- in our family the women not only cook, but they are good cooks... remember that." I guess it took me giving him his first great grandchild before he really ever approved of me, but I believe Avery made up for any meal that I could ever prepare!
We spent the whole weekend in Fayetteville with Brian's family and the services were on Monday. Brian told Avery shortly after he got the call on Friday that G-daddy had gone to live in heaven, like Grandma Fuller did (last January) because he was sick and Jesus wanted him there. Well, on the way to the hotel Saturday night (after leaving the grandparents' house), Avery asked us where G-daddy was today. I took a deep breath and tried to explain that he was very old and sick and Jesus didn't want him to be sick anymore, so he let him die and come live in heaven with him and the angels. Avery responded, "Well- when am I going to die and go help the angels"? I took another deep breath while mine and Brian's eyes filled with tears. Brian said, "not for a very long time" and thankfully, that was a good enough answer for Avery until...
I tried to prepare him on Sunday night for what would happen on Monday. I told him that (my parents) Mimi and Papa were coming to play with Avery and Baby Anna (his cousin) while we went to church to sing songs and be happy that Granddaddy now lives in heaven. Avery told me, "Well- I'm not happy. I miss him and that makes me sad." I responded by telling him that was okay and that we were sad too, but that we were glad he was not sick anymore. He asked me, "Well, when is Grandaddy going to be back at GiGi's house?" I had to tell him that he wouldn't be back at GiGi's, but that we would see him again one day.
I never knew how hard it would be to explain death to a 3 year old. Obviously, I know he still doesn't understand, but I just wonder how much of it that "he gets". He has lost 2 of his great grandparents in less than a year and I am just trying to be thankful that he knew them at all and hope that we can keep their memory alive so that he somewhat remembers them as time continues. What is so sad, though, is that he probably won't really remember them, and both of these people thought the world of him! In WD McCall's words, "That is one smart youngin'; there ain't a thing wrong with his brain and he don't miss a thing!".
2 comments:
That is so sweet.....and like I hadn't cried enough already today!
Aww...poor Avery! It sounds like you had a lot of serious talks with him and I'm impressed that you even told him that much! don't worry though, that's the blessing of being young...the wounds heal faster. It's B that may take a little longer!
We love ya'll and are here if you need anything!
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